LOBSTER LINGO

First Slack [furst slak]

- Noun

1. The first slack tide after dawn on the first day of mini-season. This is the prime time to dive for lobsters because it is the first legal dive without a current since the end of regular season. This means that the bugs are plentiful and you don't have to waste your energy fighting the current. First slack varies between high tide and low tide and time of day depending on the year.

Example: The viz was awesome during first slack this year. You could spot bugs from a mile away.

PIRATE MUSIC

Flogging Molly - The Salty Dog

DOES MINISEASON HURT THE KEYS?

The FWC makes a straight faced estimate that about 500,000 pounds of lobster are taken during the sport season – again based on their trusty questionnaire. The more realistic number is closer to 1,000,000 pounds. With a single season opening, a percentage of these would be caught by trappers, and provide a shot in the arm for an industry that is currently being regulated to death. Fishing For a Living

I was scouring the internet for miniseason news when I stumbled across this article written by, who I can only assume is a Florida Keys commercial fisherman. While it has some valid points I think that their frustration is misplaced.

Obviously any businessman who loses out do to government regulation would be frustrated, and rightfully so. However, upon examination of his or her argument, I believe it misses the economic impact on the Keys completely. Granted I am taking them completely at their word on the numbers in their articles, but they state that in 35 years the interest in mini season has grown from a few recreational divers to 50,000+. The article also double's the FWC's lobster pound estimate (which it provides no support for, but repeatedly criticizes the FWC's study) at 1,000,000 pounds. 

Based on the quasi scientific guess of this author, even at $5.50 per pound that means miniseason costs the Florida Keys an estimated $5,500,000. At 50,000 divers that is an economic impact of $110 per diver, and only $55 per diver according to the FWC's estimates.

I am not trying to take anything away from commercial fisherman but lets be realistic here, each person in our group spends well over $55 - $110 to go to the keys for this experience. When you consider planes, gas for cars and boats, food, lodging, equipment, drinks, entertainment, and everything in-between, I hate to add it up but we are probably talking at least $700 a person.Granted not all of that ends up in the Keys or in Florida but I guarantee a majority of it ends up in Florida and more than $110 gets left in the Keys.

Again, I have no qualms against the author for standing up for an industry but at the same time I think they are looking at the issue from a very small perspective. Regardless, lets all keep the industry and the wildlife in mind this year while we dive for lobsters. There is a reason that quotas are in place... so that we can all share in this glorious experience for many more years to come.

LION FISH INVASION

Exotic Pets Invade Keys

The Lion Fish epidemic is one that everybody who loves the Keys should be aware of. Lion Fish are not native to Florida waters but have most likely been introduced by pet owners who release the menace in the open ocean. The species is undoubtedly very cool looking, but they are by far the most damaging plague to hit the waters of the Florida Keys since this year's speedo epidemic.

The good news is that they are apparently pretty tasty and have been popping up in lobstermen's traps lately. The fish are poisonous so don't try to grab them, but do feel free to spear them. The population continues to grow and is only becoming more and more of a threat to the reefs. I can't say I've seen Lion Fish on a menu, but if you do I think we all owe it to ourselves to eat as many of these bastards as possible.

Mini Season 2011

Photo Recap

Warning: May content an unnecessary amount of speedos

Mini Season 2011

LOBSTER LAWS

Know Your Limit

With miniseason right around the corner its important to know exactly how many lobsters you are allowed to legally possess. The laws actual vary in different areas of Florida ,so first off you need to know where you are fishing. You are on your own on that one.

Most of Florida allows each diver to catch12 lobsters per day of miniseason. Meaning, you are allowed to be in possession of 12 lobsters on the first day and 24 on the second day. You are NOT allowed to be in possession of 24 on the first day. Nice try though!

You must also be aware that while you are on the water you are only allowed to be in possession of the daily limit. This means that if you don't catch your limit the first day you are not allowed to go out the second day and have more than your allowed 12 lobsters on the boat. 

However there are exceptions to the 12 lobster rule and that is in Monroe County and Biscayne National Park. In these two lobster havens each person is only allowed to possess 6 lobsters per day. 

It can be easy to lose count of your catch if you have a lot of people on board so make sure you have a system in place and if you aren't sure, always recount. The FWC will be out in full force and the last thing you want is a big fine to ruin your bug killin' vacation.

PREPARING FOR MINISEASON

Fishing License Renewal

With miniseason only a few weeks away its time to start preparing so that you are ready to go at that first slack tide. The most important thing every lobsterman needs (after their net and tickle stick) would be their lobster license.

Available at a variety of locations a fishing license is an essential requirement if you are planning on catching some bugs this July. Prices can be found at the FWC's website, but for a cost analysis breakdown the only place to go is... right here. 

For out-of-state residents its pretty simple, if you are only planning on fishing in FL for miniseason the most logical option is the $17, 3-day saltwater fishing license with the added $5 lobster permit. Obviously, if you'll be here longer the 7 day or Annual licenses are also available.

For Florida residents the age old question lingers... to buy the lifetime license or not? Well here is our completely unscientific breakdown:

Current Rates (assuming you are over 13, because if not just buy the damn lifetime license):

Lifetime: $301.50

Annual License: $22 ($17 + $5 lobster permit)

Basically, if you were to continue buying the annual license you would break even after 13 years of miniseasons. However, if you take into account increases in license costs (in 2010 the lobster permit increased $3),  inflation, and online purchase surcharges, and you are more likely to break even in about 9 or 10 years. 

Of course 10 years sounds like a long time, but seeing as how this is my 6th year I'm kicking myself for only buying the lifetime license last year. Plus if you add in the added benefit of not needing to remember to renew your license every year, it just starts making sense.

As a bonus the money spent on lifetime licenses actually goes to a really awesome conservation program. The money collected is not allowed to be spent, but all of the interest that it earns goes to funding fish and wildlife programs. 

P.S. I have totally lost count of how many years I've gone, but I think 6 is pretty close.

Recipes for a Mini-Season Feast

Grilled Lobster Tails

Grilled lobster tails are a great way to mix it up from the normal steam bath that tails typically get.

Ingredients

1. Tails
2. Melted Butter
3. Garlic
4. Fresh Lime
5. Salt
6. Pepper

Directions

Follow instructions on how to de-shell the lobster. Once you have the tails out of the shell get a nice hot grill. We will be cooking the tails directly on the fire.

Mince and smash fresh garlic and add it to a tablespoon or two of butter. Melt the butter with the garlic in it.

Brush both sides of the tails with the Garlic butter. Add a small amount of salt and pepper to taste (remember most butter has salt in it and if the tails are fresh they just came out of salt water).

Place the tail meat directly on the HOT fire. Cook for about 1-2 minutes and flip. Squeeze a little lime juice on the tails. Cook for another 1-2 minutes or until the tail has a little color on it.

AMATEUR HOUR

Grabbing the Antennae

It is easy to get caught up in the moment and try to pull a bug out of his hole with your bare hand. Every lobsterman has tried it at some point. Those antennae sticking out from underneath that rock just look too tempting. However, as you will quickly learn this is a fast way to not only scare your catch farther into his crevice but to also sentence it to death.

Spiny lobsters don't have claws to defend themselves, that means their antennae server as their main defensive weapon. Despite this, a lobster will quickly shed its antennae and limbs if they are grasped by a predator. There is no way that you will catch a lobster by grabbing it by anything other than its carapace, so don't even bother to try. Not only will you not have a way to clean the bastard if you do manage to catch him, but he has become an easy meal for smarter predators than you. Studies have shown that the survival rate for a lobster without antennae is substantially less than that of one with even one antennae.

Likewise, you also want to be careful when removing a lobster from your net and measuring it because at that point the lobster is extremely threatened and will easily drop its appendages in an attempt to escape. Remember, those shorts will some day be legal sized and if you rip off its legs and antennae then some fish, and not you, is going to be the one eating it.

PIRATE MUSIC

Brine and Bastards - The Fog

EVOLUTION OF THE FLAG

For those of you out there who are history buffs, I figured I would give you all a glimpse into the creation of our official logo. The original design was hastily created during an epiphany. It was a crude mock up of my ultimate vision, but it formed the basis of what would eventually become the infamous pirate lobster flag.

The legend continues after the jump...

UM... HOLY SHIT!

Two Months to Miniseason

Thanks to being distracted by the end of the world and without all of last year's activities, like creating the flag, logistics of the coozies, designing the t-shirts, and the relying on the monthly countdown, I will have to admit that the immanency of miniseason has escaped me. My fellow lobstermen, I kid you not, but there is a mere two months until the first bugs of the season will be slaughtered.

So request time off from work and start your training routines because this is really happening. Of course, now that I've realized how close we are the time will probably just pass that much more slowly. Oh well, at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

INDIAN KEY

If you manage to catch your limit with some time to kill, one thing you might want to check out is the Key's very own ghost town, known as Indian Key. At one point in time this island was the county seat for Monroe County, but now it is a State Park. Along with Key West, the island was the only part of the keys to remain populated during the Second Seminole War. That is, until the Seminole Indians staged a raid of the island and massacred 13 of the residents while forcing the other 50 or so people to flee the island.

There is not a whole lot to do on Indian Key, but it has an interesting history and there are still some remnants left from the people who lived there. There is a nice boat dock and a lookout tower provided by the park service, but I don't remember there being a whole lot else. I do remember it being really hot, with not much shade on the walking paths. Its a tiny island and only takes a short time to explore, so if you happen to be boating by with some time to kill be sure to check it out.

While you are there, try to guess what the "deep opening" is in the town square... because thanks to this placard we know that the Florida Park System has no idea. Hey, at least they're honest.

EARLY START TO MINISEASON IS NOT WORTH IT

Reminder: Miniseason is July 27 and 28

A Tampa man wound up being fined more than $13,000 for trying to get a jump on lobster mini-season in July 2010, according to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

After being declared guilty by Monroe County Judge Peary Fowler in a Feb. 11 hearing, Shabott was fined $12,150 and assessed court costs for a total cost of $13,095. The fines work out to $335 per illegally taken lobster. KeysNet

And I thought that my bill for miniseason was expensive last year. Try going a few days early like this jackalope. I mean seriously, is it that hard to find lobsters during miniseason that you have to go two days early? 

I suppose I could understand if this guy couldn't take off of work and was so pissed that he drove down the weekend before and created his own mini-miniseason, but this dumbass was there on Monday just wringing tails like it was going out of style.

The worst part is at $335 per tail, he still doesn't get to eat any of those tasty bugs. Something tells me he will be paying extra special attention to our countdown timer this year.

GEARING UP

Mobile Tide Charts

Marine Weather by Bluefin

Discover more Android apps

Of the tide chart apps I have tried this is by far the best. It uses Google Maps to help you focus in on your desired location and allows you to save favorites for easy reference.

This is a necessary download for any lobster pirate who doesn't rely on a hookah, and still actually cares when slack tide is. Check it out at http://www.bluefinengineering.com/. There is also an ad-free version for $1.99.

LAST CHANCE

Regular Season Ends March 31st

Just a heads up that this is your last chance to go snag some crustaceans before the regular lobster season ends. You need to put that license to good use before it expires... not that I ever do. A classic example of do as I say not as I do. Anyways, happy hunting!

PIRATE MUSIC

The Real McKenzies - Mainland

MONSTER LOBSTER

I Need A Bigger Net

A WHOPPING 15-pound crawfish (spiny lobster) was caught by fishermen and brought to The Tribune this week. Lllewelyn Fox proudly displays the lobster, which he said his son purchased on Potter's Cay dock. The Tribune

Now that is what I call a lobster! If I knew any better I might think that guy's holding the ghost lobster. I mean let's be honest, if I saw that bug hanging out under a coral-head I would probably shit myself. There's no doubt in my mind that beast would win a fight between me and him. I have a hard enough time holding onto a short while I'm trying to measure it, never mind a lobster bigger than me.

LOBSTER LINGO

Bag Man [bag man]

- Noun

Inflected form: Bag, Bagging, Bagged

1. A snorkeler who follows a diver around while holding a lobster catch bag so the diver doesn't have to swim with it. The bag man's job is to keep an eye on the diver and descend to meet the diver with the bag when the diver has caught a lobster.

Example: My back is completely burned because I spent the day bagging for my friend.

AMATEUR HOUR

The Open Catch Bag

One mistake that is easy to make but should never be made, is to start lobster hunting without checking to make sure that your catch bag is securely closed. There is nothing worse than putting that first keeper into your bag just to see him shoot out the other end and into the murky abyss.

There are a variety of different catch bags, some close with velcro, some with zippers, and others with latches. Whatever is the case be sure that yours is securely fastened.

If you can convince a friend to do it, having a bag man can be very useful. This will increase your mobility and allow you to more easily catch those pesky lobsters. Plus not only do you get to blame him if the lobsters escape but if the ghost lobster happens to appear it will be the guy holding the bag full of lobsters he will be pissed off at, not you.

OPERATION WILD

I stumbled across this TV show the other night. It's a Cops style show featuring the FWC. In case anyone was wondering what happened to that footage they shot of us getting boarded two or three years ago, I am guessing this is where it ended up. It's on Planet Green, but its just reruns now so you'll have to keep an eye out for it if you want to catch a glimpse of the Betsy II. Man, I wish we had the pirate flag back then... we would definitely have gotten a cameo appearance.

HALF WAY THERE

6 Months Until Mini-Season 2011

That's right ladies and gentlemen, don't look now but we just hit the halfway mark.

Now do the lobster dance!