The Revolution WILL Be Televised
BP says it will continue to provide a live video feed of the ruptured pipe gushing oil into the Gulf of Mexico during Wednesday's planned top kill procedure to seal the well. CNN
Apparently, BP has changed its tune and will grant the teeming masses a front row seat to "Top Kill", which is being billed as a viscous-pumping thriller starring the unstoppable and daring tandem of Maverick and James Bond as they attempt to plug the indomitable oil spill. "Tower, this is Ghost Lobster requesting a flyby."
BP could not dramatize, to its detriment, this disaster anymore if it hired Jerry Bruckheimer. Why not just call it BP's "If-This-Fails-Fuck-It-You-Deal-With-It-Obama-Top-Kill". That is where this has to be going if your six thousandth proposed solution is called Top Kill. BP is already setting itself up for failure by using this stupid name that any casual observer would perceive to be the end-all solution based on the name Top Kill. Meanwhile, the method is expected to unleash for your viewing pleasure a lot more oil from the open pipe than is currently being released and only has a 60% percent chance of succeeding (about what Shaq shoots from the line), not to mention that this is the first time it is being attempted at such a deep depth.
Anyway, get your popcorn ready. Here's hoping Top Kill is successful:
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