DOES MINISEASON HURT THE KEYS?

The FWC makes a straight faced estimate that about 500,000 pounds of lobster are taken during the sport season – again based on their trusty questionnaire. The more realistic number is closer to 1,000,000 pounds. With a single season opening, a percentage of these would be caught by trappers, and provide a shot in the arm for an industry that is currently being regulated to death. Fishing For a Living

I was scouring the internet for miniseason news when I stumbled across this article written by, who I can only assume is a Florida Keys commercial fisherman. While it has some valid points I think that their frustration is misplaced.

Obviously any businessman who loses out do to government regulation would be frustrated, and rightfully so. However, upon examination of his or her argument, I believe it misses the economic impact on the Keys completely. Granted I am taking them completely at their word on the numbers in their articles, but they state that in 35 years the interest in mini season has grown from a few recreational divers to 50,000+. The article also double's the FWC's lobster pound estimate (which it provides no support for, but repeatedly criticizes the FWC's study) at 1,000,000 pounds. 

Based on the quasi scientific guess of this author, even at $5.50 per pound that means miniseason costs the Florida Keys an estimated $5,500,000. At 50,000 divers that is an economic impact of $110 per diver, and only $55 per diver according to the FWC's estimates.

I am not trying to take anything away from commercial fisherman but lets be realistic here, each person in our group spends well over $55 - $110 to go to the keys for this experience. When you consider planes, gas for cars and boats, food, lodging, equipment, drinks, entertainment, and everything in-between, I hate to add it up but we are probably talking at least $700 a person.Granted not all of that ends up in the Keys or in Florida but I guarantee a majority of it ends up in Florida and more than $110 gets left in the Keys.

Again, I have no qualms against the author for standing up for an industry but at the same time I think they are looking at the issue from a very small perspective. Regardless, lets all keep the industry and the wildlife in mind this year while we dive for lobsters. There is a reason that quotas are in place... so that we can all share in this glorious experience for many more years to come.

LION FISH INVASION

Exotic Pets Invade Keys

The Lion Fish epidemic is one that everybody who loves the Keys should be aware of. Lion Fish are not native to Florida waters but have most likely been introduced by pet owners who release the menace in the open ocean. The species is undoubtedly very cool looking, but they are by far the most damaging plague to hit the waters of the Florida Keys since this year's speedo epidemic.

The good news is that they are apparently pretty tasty and have been popping up in lobstermen's traps lately. The fish are poisonous so don't try to grab them, but do feel free to spear them. The population continues to grow and is only becoming more and more of a threat to the reefs. I can't say I've seen Lion Fish on a menu, but if you do I think we all owe it to ourselves to eat as many of these bastards as possible.

EVOLUTION OF THE FLAG

For those of you out there who are history buffs, I figured I would give you all a glimpse into the creation of our official logo. The original design was hastily created during an epiphany. It was a crude mock up of my ultimate vision, but it formed the basis of what would eventually become the infamous pirate lobster flag.

The legend continues after the jump...

EARLY START TO MINISEASON IS NOT WORTH IT

Reminder: Miniseason is July 27 and 28

A Tampa man wound up being fined more than $13,000 for trying to get a jump on lobster mini-season in July 2010, according to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

After being declared guilty by Monroe County Judge Peary Fowler in a Feb. 11 hearing, Shabott was fined $12,150 and assessed court costs for a total cost of $13,095. The fines work out to $335 per illegally taken lobster. KeysNet

And I thought that my bill for miniseason was expensive last year. Try going a few days early like this jackalope. I mean seriously, is it that hard to find lobsters during miniseason that you have to go two days early? 

I suppose I could understand if this guy couldn't take off of work and was so pissed that he drove down the weekend before and created his own mini-miniseason, but this dumbass was there on Monday just wringing tails like it was going out of style.

The worst part is at $335 per tail, he still doesn't get to eat any of those tasty bugs. Something tells me he will be paying extra special attention to our countdown timer this year.

LAST CHANCE

Regular Season Ends March 31st

Just a heads up that this is your last chance to go snag some crustaceans before the regular lobster season ends. You need to put that license to good use before it expires... not that I ever do. A classic example of do as I say not as I do. Anyways, happy hunting!

MONSTER LOBSTER

I Need A Bigger Net

A WHOPPING 15-pound crawfish (spiny lobster) was caught by fishermen and brought to The Tribune this week. Lllewelyn Fox proudly displays the lobster, which he said his son purchased on Potter's Cay dock. The Tribune

Now that is what I call a lobster! If I knew any better I might think that guy's holding the ghost lobster. I mean let's be honest, if I saw that bug hanging out under a coral-head I would probably shit myself. There's no doubt in my mind that beast would win a fight between me and him. I have a hard enough time holding onto a short while I'm trying to measure it, never mind a lobster bigger than me.

OPERATION WILD

I stumbled across this TV show the other night. It's a Cops style show featuring the FWC. In case anyone was wondering what happened to that footage they shot of us getting boarded two or three years ago, I am guessing this is where it ended up. It's on Planet Green, but its just reruns now so you'll have to keep an eye out for it if you want to catch a glimpse of the Betsy II. Man, I wish we had the pirate flag back then... we would definitely have gotten a cameo appearance.

YOU SNOOZE, YOU LOSE

Oregon Man Steals the Name "Captain Awesome"

Douglas Allen Smith Jr. says he changed his name to Captain Awesome last month because he was inspired by the nickname of a character on the NBC television show "Chuck" — Dr. Devon "Captain Awesome" Woodcomb.

The unemployed Eugene cabinet installer says he found it funny Woodcomb's father gave him that nickname because a "poor nickname builds good character."

The former Mr. Smith says he faced a Lane County judge who questioned his seriousness. The judge that granted the request made him swear he wasn't changing his name for fraudulent reasons.

Awesome says that judge also allowed him to sign his name as a right arrow, a smiley face and a left arrow.

He says his bank, however, has refused to accept the signature because it could be forged too easily. SF Chronicle

If you are wondering who that asshole in the picture is, its apparently the fake "Captain Awesome" number one, from the TV Show "Chuck." Yeah I know, I've never seen it either.

I'm not sure if I am more pissed that the "Chuck" writers obviously read our blog and straight stole our shit, or that this guy is giving them the credit for this nickname, or that we didn't drunkenly decide to legally change John's name to Captain Awesome before this jerk-off did.

As much as I refuse to believe that anyone who regularly watches "Chuck" deserves the name Captain Awesome, his signature idea is pretty boss. Screw his local bank, when is the last time anyone at a bank ever actually matched up signatures on anything. I could sign my name with a drawing of a dick and no one would notice... in fact I know I could, Sack does it all the time.

MY OFFICIAL COUNTDOWN HAS BEGUN

Sure the 2011 mini season is still about 9 months away, however last night my own personal countdown trigger was pulled.

Every year leading up to mini season, and yes I do consider 9 months away leading up, I will start to have incredibly vivid dreams about the upcoming trip. They are always almost identical.

• We are out on day 1 catching bugs.
• We realize too late that we missed the first slack tide (which would be my fault).
  
• We don't get our day one limit.
• We struggle to limit on day two.

No joke, I have had this dream more times than I can count on my fingers. Obviously this is an incredibly stressful dream for me. I will then undoubtedly wake up from the dream and my mind will begin to race, making plans for the upcoming year. I think about what our strategy will be to start the opening day this year, what we can do better than the prior year, what new techniques or tools we need to bring down with us, how do we need to change our budget, etc.

I also start to worry about the logistics of the trip. This year already has two big question marks:

1. When am I going to be able to make it down.
2. Who will be our 8? We only have room for 8 on the boat (and that is stretching it) but this year we are likely going to have at least 9 guys that want to come. Those guys that are on the waiting list are going to be pissed if they can't get back in this year.

I legitimately woke up at around 5 am last night after this dream and thought about this stuff until I got out of bed around 7. Moral of the story: a lot of thought goes into mini season on our end, so come prepared.

I am also guessing that I am probably the only one in the entire world that begins to strategize in November for the upcoming mini season the following July.

LOBSTER BUST

FWC Seizes 345 Shorts from Lobster Boat

State wildlife officials made their biggest illegal lobster seizure of the 2010-11 season in the Florida Keys Thursday night.
About 345 undersized lobsters were seized from the 40-foot Trinity on Stock Island at 7 p.m. after it returned from a six-day fishing trip with 5,000 pounds of lobsters worth about $30,000, said Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) spokesman Bobby Dube. KeysNews

Well, sucks to be them. Nothing like 345 shorts to really put a dent in your profit margins. This is why you need to hire a full-time measuring man like Sack. What he lacks in catching prowess he more than makes up for in ability to put a plastic gauge on top of a lobster.

The best part of the article is probably the commentators. A bunch of the captain's family were trying to defend him and everyone else was just ripping on them. Gotta love the internet commentator veil of secrecy.

Mini Season 2011 Update

I realize that many of you were anxiously awaiting an update on the status of lobster mini season 2011.

After much negotiating, phone calls, and visits to potential locations we have successfully turned a potentially season ending situation around.

While we are not 100% out of the dark yet, it does appear that the season will go off as planned. It will require some travel and work by all attendees but it can definitely be done. In addition to planning for the last week in July, it now appears that there will be a recommended meeting for all in Minneapolis over the weekend of July 9th.

Please stay tuned for future updates.

LOBSTER SEASON OFF TO STRONG START

Mini Season Catch is Not Making Me Rich

"Spiny lobsters are abundant in supply and demand is strong, according to several of the state's largest lobster producers who provided data to the Florida Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services," said an agency report Thursday.

Dockside prices paid to fishermen this season have been running $5.50 to $5.25 per pound, according to reports. A legal size lobster generally weighs about a pound.

At the start of the 2009 season, the poor economy and frozen lobster left from the previous year pushed wholesale prices down to just about $3 per pound -- a rate not seen since the 1980s. KeysNet


I am as glad as anyone that the lobster population is plentiful this year, we can skip that part of this news article. The real reason for this post was to bitch that the twelve tails I brought home are only worth $60 and the year before that they were only worth $36! I know you can't put a price on fun but c'mon, at least give me triple digits here.

As much as I love the Keys, after reading this, there is no way I envy fishermen down there anymore. I mean how many bugs do you have to catch just to break even? Probably like 50,000. I mean its a pain in the ass just to catch twelve, no thank you, I'll keep doing my fishing at Publix.

P.S. Those "trap molesters" (as the article so eloquently puts it) are damn ballsy. I don't even want to know what some crazy, old, salty fisherman making $3 per lobster would do if he caught you stealing from his trap.

SMART PHONE BACKGROUNDS

In case anyone wants the flag image for their phone background here are two versions that should hopefully work. If they don't let me know.

Droid

iPhone

IS IT REALLY OVER?

51 More Weeks Until Mini Season 2011

Congratulations on another successful hunt... unfortunately the Ghost Lobster escaped again but we found plenty of his friends, so I'm not gonna complain. Here are some observations from this year's trip:

     1.     There seemed to be less boats out this year then previous years, the lobsters better send BP a Christmas card.

     2.     When your captain is wearing a pink and black Speedo, the FWC lets the Coast Guard handle the boarding of that vessel.

     3.     For all the threats of oil and tropical storms leading up to this season, the water could not have been more calm and clear.

     4.     Don't believe the hype, Keystone Light is not as smooth as Keith Stone, and it may make your feet swell... just a heads up.

     5.     People who drive vans for a living are sketchy, period.

     6.     Having random sketchy people around can and will make for an interesting night.

     7.     One piece of drift wood was the difference between wanting to go dolphin fishing again next year and never wanting to go fishing ever again in my life.

     8.     Pirate flags are not underrated. 

LOBSTER ALE

Take One Down and Pass it Around

When you are out shopping for some tasty beverages to take down to the Keys with you keep an eye out for this salty beer that I found. I happened to stumble across it at Total Wine, but I have no idea where else you would find it. 

Its actually not bad, and I can picture it going well with our lobster feast. Too bad its not made with lobster or it would be perfect.

Now I do realize this is a Maine lobster and typically I don't pay much attention to anything that has to do with those other guys, but when it come to a lobster beer beggars can't be choosers. So until Florida Brewing company comes out with a Florida lobster beer, Lobster Ale will have to be my lobster beer of choice.

NEW LICENSE PLATE

I'm Taking it to the Streets

So I went down to the DMV today to order my new license plate, and BAM! Take that BP. 

Unfortunately it is still subject to rejection by the man but I managed to get it past their first line of defense. Its gonna take at least a month for them to make it too so I won't have it in time for mini season unfortunately.

The lady that wrote it up for me thought it was pretty funny but she did mention a few times that she was worried I might get shot. I am putting my faith in the fact that most Floridians can detect sarcasm, hopefully I don't find out the hard way that I was wrong. 

SAVE THE LORELEI

Lorelei Under New Management Due to Bankruptcy

A trustee, and not Carl Lindback III, will have control over the famous Lorelei property on Upper Matecumbe Key while Lindback's Lorelei Associates goes through Chapter 11 bankruptcy reorganization. Keys News

So apparently the Lorelei has been run into the ground and they have filed bankruptcy to avoid a foreclosure. This is some bummer news for our group who frequent this watering hole. 

Fortunately, for businesses, foreclosure and bankruptcy are not a death knell and hopefully the Lorelei can come out of this as a profitable enterprise. Because let's face it, it sure would be a shame if there were no more Giant Mermaid to grope. 

MINI SEASON STILL A GO

FWC: "No Plans to Modify or Cancel the Mini or Regular Open Seasons"

I just got some good news, straight from one of my inside sources, that the FWC is not currently considering any change to this month's upcoming mini season. By inside sources I mean a couple weeks ago I sent the FWC an inquiry about whether or not there was any concern due to the oil spill and I just received a response from them saying there is nothing to worry about. So, grab your tickle sticks fellow lobstermen cause it's bug killin' time.

After the jump: Full text of the FWC's official response.

WE NEED YOUR HELP

Send in Your Pics

So apparently there are only about seven pictures of hot girls holding lobsters on the entire interweb. If you happen to be out this mini season and snap a picture of a chica holding a lobster send it in to us at miniseason.blogspot@gmail.com. 

I'd love to do another countdown next year but I promise you I scoured the internet for weeks just to put seven months worth of quality pics together. So next year we need some help or its gonna be ugly...

LOBSTER PERMIT RATE INCREASE

Starting July 1, Permit Prices Increase

The cost of two saltwater fishing permits also will go up on July 1. The snook permit will increase from $2 to $10, and lobster permits will increase from $2 to $5. FWC

Granted its only $3, but when you think about it that is like 6 Busch Lights. Anyway, you can still buy permits good for a year at the current prices, so if you purchase them before July 1st you will be covered throughout the entire upcoming lobster season.

If you want to save yourself a couple Washingtons go here to purchase licenses online. Otherwise check our FAQs to see where else you can get a license.