AFTER THE CATCH

Cleaning the Lobster

Well congratulations, you have a cooler full of fresh lobster and you managed to get back to your house without running aground or being pirated for your booty. But now what do you do with all those squealing bugs? Well killer... it's time to kill. You didn't think lobster hunting was all glitter and sparkles did you? You are a lobster hunter, they are your prey, and its time to wring those bastards like the scum they are. No, its not pretty but its a necessity, and a great way to break in some newbies.

Cleaning lobsters is pretty simple, but there are a few steps that any lobster pirate needs to know in order to quickly and efficiently tear through that pile of keepers. The first step is to take the lobster in both hands, place one on the carapace (head) and one on the tail. Rotate the lobster in opposite directions and pull the carapace and tail apart from one another.

Before discarding the head break off one of the antenna, this will become a necessary tool in the next step. If you are a pimp and have a house on a canal, be aware that you may not toss the heads in the canal. Save them in a cooler or a bucket and take them out to the ocean later to dump them.

ROOKIE MISTAKE ALERT: Make sure that you throw out the head and NOT the tail. Yes, it has happened, don't laugh. Plus, that was back when you could thrown the heads in the canals, so that lobster tail was some lucky fish's dinner instead of ours.

Next take the lobster tail and turn it over, you will notice a small hole near the end of the tail. Yes, this is the poop shoot, I never said this was going to be pretty. Take the broken antenna (thick end first) and insert it into the lobster's ass. Jam it in there good, because if your gonna do something at least do it right. Pull out the antenna and it should drag with it the lobster's intestines... or whatever it is.

That's it, your lobster is now clean and read to store, cook, or barter with.

Thanks to All Kayak Fishing for the pics.

MY OFFICIAL COUNTDOWN HAS BEGUN

Sure the 2011 mini season is still about 9 months away, however last night my own personal countdown trigger was pulled.

Every year leading up to mini season, and yes I do consider 9 months away leading up, I will start to have incredibly vivid dreams about the upcoming trip. They are always almost identical.

• We are out on day 1 catching bugs.
• We realize too late that we missed the first slack tide (which would be my fault).
  
• We don't get our day one limit.
• We struggle to limit on day two.

No joke, I have had this dream more times than I can count on my fingers. Obviously this is an incredibly stressful dream for me. I will then undoubtedly wake up from the dream and my mind will begin to race, making plans for the upcoming year. I think about what our strategy will be to start the opening day this year, what we can do better than the prior year, what new techniques or tools we need to bring down with us, how do we need to change our budget, etc.

I also start to worry about the logistics of the trip. This year already has two big question marks:

1. When am I going to be able to make it down.
2. Who will be our 8? We only have room for 8 on the boat (and that is stretching it) but this year we are likely going to have at least 9 guys that want to come. Those guys that are on the waiting list are going to be pissed if they can't get back in this year.

I legitimately woke up at around 5 am last night after this dream and thought about this stuff until I got out of bed around 7. Moral of the story: a lot of thought goes into mini season on our end, so come prepared.

I am also guessing that I am probably the only one in the entire world that begins to strategize in November for the upcoming mini season the following July.