PIRATE MUSIC

The Lonely Island - I'm On A Boat

NEEDLE FISHING

Needle fishing is a mini season tradition that started in 2008 when we decided to attempt bully netting for the first time. Since we had, and still have, no idea how to bully net our excursion was not going so well. As we were trolling the bay we realized that needle fish seemed to be attracted to our underwater light and out of sheer boredom it didn't take long for us to start trying to catch them. Before you knew it this had turned into a competition of who could be the first to catch one of those slippery darts.

Don't be fooled, catching needle fish is no easy task. We have been trying for the last two years to catch a needle fish and have come up empty handed. Now I know what you are thinking.... "I just Googled needle fish and there are pictures of people holding them, it can't be that hard"... well I'll bet the farm they didn't catch those needle fish by hand! Thats right if you are not needle fishing by hand you are not needle fishing.

Although we are yet to actually get a needle fish onto our boat here are a few tips for anyone who wants to try and out do us:

1. The needle fish love figure eights, shining the light in a figure eight pattern will attract them.

2. Be patient, do not scare them by prematurely motioning towards the water.

3. You need to lead the needle fish, they are quick so strike in front of where you think they will be.

4. Needle fish taste delicious, and I will prove it when we finally catch one.

GET A ROOM

With just over three months left until Mini Season 2010, I can only imagine that the hotels and home rentals in the Keys are starting to book up fast.

Don't get left out, remember this is one of the most heavily trafficked times in the Keys and if you want the best accommodations for your group then you need to do your research and you need to do it yesterday.

I know that we had to put a down payment on our place a few months back in order to reserve it. However, if I had been in charge we still wouldn't have a place locked up so for those of you slackers out there like me this is a friendly reminder to get moving.

While I have never actually booked our accommodations, these are a few things I have learned over the years staying in various different places that you may want to keep in mind:

1. Make sure there is A/C (there is nothing worse then trying to fall asleep in the summertime humidity of the Keys with no air conditioning)

2. If you have a boat ask about where you can dock up, preferably right at the house or at least somewhere close by (driving to and from the boat with gear is not much fun, especially at 6 in the morning for that first dive)

3. People prefer beds over couches, the more beds the better (if there are not enough beds for everyone get there early enough to call dibs on one)

4. Houses are superior to hotels (while hotels can be cheaper, if you can spend the few extra bucks to upgrade to a house there is no reason not to, there are lots of perks to houses including big kitchens, docks, and places to clean the bugs)

5. If you find a place you like stick with it (chances are your group dynamic isn't going to change dramatically year to year so once you find somewhere you like check there first and save yourself some time and effort)

6. Make sure there is a large freezer (don't forget that you will need to keep those lobster tails frozen for the time you are there and often hotel rooms only have small refrigerators incapable of storing all your catch)

Good luck everyone and if you have any other tips for fellow lobster hunters looking for a place to stay feel free to post them in the comments.

TRAINING FOR THE TRIP

Preparation

By Stephen Stancil

By following these steps one will become a more effective lobster hunter and finally slay their own bug. [Editor's note: This training regimen has no scientific basis, attempt at your own risk.]

A.  Increase bourbon consumption by 50%

B.  Save all $1 bills in a safe place for "pocket money"

C.  Breathing exercises

D.  Increase Busch Light consumption by 78%

E.  Go swimming

F.  Practice dominoes

G.  Meditate and become the lobster

Preparation H will come into effect once you ultimately get the runs from too much booze. 

RECIPES FOR A MINI SEASON FEAST

Sauteed Lobster Bites

Like a Meal we will start off with the appetizer. This recipe has been a staple from the beginning of our lobster mini season trips.

Ingredients

1. 3 Lobster tails
   
2. 2 tblsp Butter
3. 1 Fresh Lime
4. Salt
5. Pepper
6. Garlic

Directions

Follow the instructions here to de-shell the bugs. You do not need to cook the lobster all the way through. They should be raw in the middle when you finish de-shelling them.

Once de-shelled cut the partially cooked lobster into bite sized pieces. In a saute pan add the butter and garlic, bring the pan to a Medium high heat then add the lobster. Season the lobster with Salt and Cracked pepper to taste.

Cook the lobster for about 2-3 minutes (let it get a little brown on the outsides) then squeeze the lime juice over it while it is still cooking.

Cook for another 1-2 minutes (total cook time will depend on how well done the lobster was when you de-shelled it).

Take the lobster out of the pan, you can pour the butter/lime sauce that is in the pan over the top if you so choose.

Eat one before you tell anyone they are done because the taste awesome and will go quickly, I always do.

Serve with your favorite beverage, I recommend Busch Light.

GEARING UP

Tools of the Trade

There are a few different ways to catch lobsters (1) with a net and tickle stick, (2) with a bully net, and (3) with a snare. I've never known anyone who used a snare although I have read they are effective. Our one attempt at bully netting resulted in seeing a total of one lobster and spending most of the time trying to catch needle fish by hand. Therefore, this post will focus on what you will need to catch lobsters by hand the old fashioned way. Maybe someday an expert in another technique can send me a guest article about the other catching methods. 

There are four essential items that you will need when hunting lobster: (1) a net, (2) tickle stick, (3) gloves, and (4) lobster gauge. Bonus item number (5) a catch bag, is needed if you are diving on a tank.

Net: Your net is what you will use to actually trap the lobster. During the catch the net is positioned and the lobster is coaxed into it. Nets are pretty standard, just keep in mind that the bigger and bulkier the harder it will be to swim with. The main thing about your net is to make sure that you check it to make sure there are no holes in it because I guarantee those bugs will find them.

Tickle Stick: The tickle stick is your main weapon in the fight against the spiny lobsters. It is the tool you will use to help guide the lobster out from its hole or rock and into your net. There are a few different varieties of tickle sticks, when shopping around just keep in mind that you will most likely lose it, especially if you are a newbie. Once you are a professional lobster hunter I would suggest buying whatever tickle stick you want, but until then go with a cheap one. I prefer the metal versions with a slight bend on one end, as opposed to plastic ones or straight ones. I think metal ones feel better in the water and are a little more durable when digging under rocks. The bend is useful to get behind the lobster and force them out of their hole.

Gloves: Gloves are a necessity because those bugs are prickly. They have spikes and horns all over and in the water they are powerful bastards. When they start thrashing around while you are trying to get it from your net to your catch bag you will be damn glad you wore those gloves. You don't need any high tech gloves, the basic bright orange ones that come in almost every lobster hunting package are all our group ever use. In my opinion there is no sense in ruining or risking losing expensive diving gloves when cheap ones get the job done, but then again maybe I'm just a cheapskate.

Lobster Gauge: Your lobster gauge is required by law rather than as an essential tool to actual catch the lobster. The most convenient way to carry your gauge with you is to attach it to your tickle stick with a key ring, which is normally how you will buy them. The lobsters have to be measured before you take them out of the water so always measure your lobster while you have it trapped in your net to make sure it is a keeper. Plastic gauges are best, believe it or not they are actually more durable then metal ones. If you metal one bends at all it will become inaccurate and you could end up accidentally keeping an illegal lobster, and trust me the FWC isn't going to care what your excuse is. Plastic gauges are also brightly colored and can be very handy in helping you locate your tickle stick if you happen to drop it while battling with a slippery bug.

Catch Bag: If you are free-diving you will not need a catch bag, unless perhaps you are diving away from your boat (probably not the best idea) or are swimming off shore without a boat. If you are diving on a tank however, then you will most certainly want a catch bag. These are bags designed to hold numerous lobsters, so that you can continue catching them without having to return to the boat each time you net one of those suckers. The two main types are bags with one-way doors and bags with locking latches. If you are diving without a bag-man then you will 100% want a one-way bag. Otherwise there is too great of a risk of losing lobsters every time you have to open the bag to put a new one in. If you have a bag man either type of bag will work, its really a preference of the team. With a one-way bag just be sure that it is zipped up before you start shoving those lobsters in there.

LOBSTER LINGO

Keeper [kee-per]
- noun

1. A lobster that is large enough to take home and turn into dinner without risking the FWC sending you to the clinker. In Florida a keeper is a lobster with a minimum 3" carapace.

2. A girl hot enough, and only mildly annoying enough, to actually consider making your wife.

Synonyms: Legal Lobster, Dream Girl.

Example: Your goal this year is catch at least one keeper, so that you don't embarrass yourself again.